One Day I Will Have My Own Car!

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Whenever it rains I always get pissed off. Not because of the rain, rather because of the soggy-brained humans who drive on our roads mannerlessly! As in seriously, I know you have a car! That’s why there is a *whole road for you. But PULEEZ when it rains, ENLARGE YOUR BRAIN and EYES! Not all pedestrian pathways are usable during the rainy season. Have that in mind! I mean, it should be there already! You were a measly pedestrian before right? NkT! Am so pissed off!! SHENZITYPES!!

I’ve always vowed that, that day I have my own ride, I shall try my level best to drive carefully especially during rainy days and puddled roads. Because I don’t want to be on the receiving end of such rants. Today I was splashed on with muddy brown water by like three drivers. And they didn’t even look back or wave to apologize. Its so so annoying! Kwanza imagine this scenario, you’re wearing your best under the yucky circumstances and some lunatic decides he’s in too much of a hurry and won’t be on the look out for puddles on the road and *SPLASH!!* He sprays you with the latest release from the heavens and dots your outfit with an unwanted patchwork of mud and muddy water! NKT!!

Ujinga kama hii hatutaki! NKT!



On the flip side, we could complain to kanjo and blame them for not doing their work properly by ensuring that drainages actually work and that roads don’t harbour holes that breed puddles! We could smack them in the face with our wet and muddy clothes and tell them to do the laundry for its their fault. But as we are humans, its easier to blame the ‘weaker’ one of the equation. #SadReality.

In the end, I think we can work things out amicably. If you own a car and you are reading this and have on occasions done the above to anyone, SHAME SHAME SHAME ON YOU!!! Now, next time, do be on the look out for those yucky puddles and slow down. It won’t hurt. Fine, you might be honked at, but at least you know you’ll have put a smile on some faces. Especially the chiq who wore white on such a day and you slowed down so as not to splash water on her. #MakesSense right?

Have a ‘muddy-spots’-free day won’t you!

*Over & Out*

Nairobians and Rainy Traffic

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If there is one thing that every other Nairobian knows is a menace is traffic. Believe you me, no one likes it one bit. And me writing about it, doesn’t make it any news or something.

But if there is one thing that amazes me with Nariobians is the way when just a little rain eve if it has just rained for like 5 minutes, kila mtu goes haywire. Everyone owning a car suddenly “has to rush somewhere” or must leave immediately “to avoid traffic”. I wonder, what are you avoiding? If anything you are the cause of the menace that is Nairobi roads during rush hour! And even with that, why is it called rush hour anyway? Why cant it just remain a hour? Regular hour? Does it have to be rush? Ok, I sound like a broken record talking about this since its not just here that we experience mind-boggling traffic. But enyewe, even if I havent been to a place like Mumbai, aki ya nani Nairobi traffic is sometimes just too much. And this escalates tenfold when a little rain pours. We go crazy. Matatus operators look up and thank the heavens since now they can charge us in dollars! Even the grounded sickly coughing cars now get a new lease of life (not!) just because someone hataki kunyeshewa. Kwani? Is it a disease?

Jana (March 30th 2010) I stayed at the bus stop for an hour. Why? Every goddam mat is stuck somewhere in thika road, better known as jam road! The repairs look like they will take forever! I was rained on, I had left my umbrella at home (goodness me!) and since Nairobi planning is pathetic, nay, that’s an understatement, neandathal, everywhere was flooded with yucky brown water that threatened the life of my shoes and pedicure!

To top it all off, I missed an episode of the most watched show in Kenya (IMHO) Sortilegio or Love Spell on Citizen at 8pm. Ooh my sweet Alejandro I missed you :(!!!!

Alejandro and Maria Hose

It is times like those that make you wish you had a car, or better yet, lived in shags!

So, after bitching around for not having a car, being stuck in town for two hours (and because of my own stupidity and frustrations) and finally being dragged through rain without an umbrella, Me I Think that it would be nice, by maybe 2012, to be passing through a nicer, more beautiful Nairobi such as this one, don’t you think?

Artist’s impression of the proposed overpass at Globe Cinema roundabout

|Speedin – Mario|

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